Friday, December 30, 2011

What Goes Around Comes Around

{picture taken 12.25.2011}

You know that saying; "A picture is worth a thousand words?" Well, this picture of {from left to right} my brother Barrett, me, my Dad, my brother Elliott, and my Mom, is "worth" way more than "a thousand words" to me. 

Flash back 17 years {wow}, I was adjusting to my new life as a boarding school student, living thousands of miles away from my family and friends, and feeling very much like a "fish out of water." But I was settling in nicely, had made a few good friends, and was excelling both academically and athletically. It was "Parent's Weekend" and I couldn't have been more excited for my parents to come visit me, meet my new friends, and see the place I now called "home." They arrived, watched my field hockey game, and walked around the campus, remarking how impressed and proud they were that I was in this place. I was equally impressed and proud to show them off; because in my mind, we were a "perfectly normal" family, full of love, comfort, and support. I always knew, in my heart, that I could count on my parents for anything and everything.

But what happened next, was something I never could have counted on: My parents and I went to their hotel room so that they could "get ready" for our impending dinner with  my best friend and her parents. We were all sitting around, still reflecting and commenting on the wonderfulness of my new "home," when my parents sat down on the bed across from me and told me that they had something they wanted to "talk to me about." Immediately, I thought that my Mom was pregnant. Sadly, the "conversation" began very differently than I could have ever imagined: "We are getting a divorce." 

Tears were shed, feelings of anger, confusion, and shock were too overwhelming to digest, and promises of "we are still best friends" and "everything is going to be ok," were thrown out there in quiet desperation. Ultimately, these feelings and thoughts wouldn't be the firsts of the heartbreaks and disappointments I would experience over the next 10 years because of my parents' divorce.

Many journals, prayers, wishes, and dreams were created and imagined over the years, with the hope and intention that one day, my family would be all together again; laughing, loving, and enjoying each other, while celebrating the special and unique bond we naturally and organically share as a family. 

When I became a Mom, many of the feelings I had suppressed for so long about my parents' divorce, rose to the surface. I wanted {so very much} for my boys to share special moments with both of my parents together in the same room, at the same time, sharing in the same magic of the holidays and the every-days. And most importantly, I wanted my boys to believe that no matter what happens in life, love conquers all! 

17 years later, December 25th, 2011, love proved to conquer all!! My Mom, Dad, brothers, husband, and two little boys, were all together . . . . the 8 of us. It was a rare and special moment; and one that I am not really sure will ever happen, ever again. 

But what I do know for certain, is that I will cherish that moment forever in my heart: A constant reminder to always BELIEVE in LOVE and a lesson on knowing that the most valuable things in our lives are truly PRICELESS.


In gratitude, 

Samantha





6 comments:

  1. Sam, such a heart tugging post. Love you. Love your heart

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  2. Love this, Sam. What a blessing :) I'm still waiting for that moment...

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  3. So happy that you were all able to share the spirit of Christmas with your family and that you experienced the joy you wished for. Thank you for sharing. Let's get together this year!

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